The Female Perspective (Part I)

I seem to wonder a lot lately the exact nature of my existence; the reason I have become this unique creature. In an attempt to solve this enigma I have decided to disect the women that have influenced my life (the men will come later just because, in my humble opinion, their species is so much more difficult to comprehend). My wonderous journey begins with my great-great grandmother, simply for chronological purposes.

I was blessed with the auspicious pleasure of knowing this amazing lady, Millie. At my birth she was already 83 years old. I was 15 years old when she passed away. She endured this world for nearly a century. She survived the depression, witnessed the inventions of the car and airplane , and watched in amazement while the first man walked on the moon. She tirelessly raised five generations. She helped raise her two youngest sisters while her parents were alive and was made their guardians after her parents' death. She raised her son, his daughter, her four children and finally me. She lived with my Nanny (her granddaughter) for most of her adult life.

Life, love and heartbreak never broke her spirit. She survived the death of her husband and the suicide of her only son. She rarely spoke of either but behind her bright eyes you could see just a hint of sadness. I suppose a modest amount of sorrow is acceptable as long as it doesn't bury you. Millie was the epitome of fortitude, the strongest person I have ever met.

To me, she was also this lady of mystery. The subject of my bewilderment was the steamer trunk she had in her room. If I could only see inside the trunk I knew that I would have the solution to all of life's little mysteries. She guarded its contents as if it were the Shroud of Turin. Occasionally she would hint at the valuables inside. To encourage best behavior from me she would promise me that I could play with the dollie inside the trunk. Obviously I didn't meet her expectations since I never laid eyes on this dollie in her lifetime. After she died my mother inherited the Shroud of Turin and I was finally able to satisfy my curiosity. Everything that truly mattered to her was contained inside the trunk. Most importantly, for the first time I laid my eyes upon the elusive dollie. It was the most beautiful object I had ever seen; yet not for her eshtetics.

My mother inherited the dollie and it is on proud display. I long for the day when it will be mine. One day, when I am a "good girl," I am going take it out of its box, sit right on the floor and play with it for hours on end; realizing how fortunate I was to be loved by this amazing woman. I only hope that one day I can earn the right to hold her most treasured valuable.